Encourage: Receive the Challenge

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Encourage One Another

"And let us consider how to stir one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near" Hebrews 10:24-25 (English Standard Version)

Hebrews 10 tells the believer to stir each other up and encourage one another. Often when we think of encouraging another person we think of someone who speaks positively and lifts others up, somewhat like a cheerleader. But encouragement goes beyond flattering words and positive thinking. The Greek word used in Hebrews means to exhort and admonish; which means this verse is actually telling us to challenge each other, give advice, express a warning, and even let another believer know when we disapprove of their actions. Encouragement is not flattery, it is motivating another person to a higher level for living.

This verse is warning believers to not stop challenging each other to become more Christ-like in our living. It reminds us that we need each other to motivate us toward change, as Proverbs 27:17 says, "Iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend" (English Standard Version). This kind of encouragement is essential in the church between believers, but it is not limited to believers in the church.

What Does this Look Like in the School?

Encouragement of believers can be extended and increased through the Christian school. A school that has biblically-based standards (and abides by them) provides that encouragement daily in the lives of the students. But encouragement should not stop at the level of teachers to students. Parents and school personnel should also be challenged, which is why we need to foster a partnership between the adults of a school. There must be a relationship with a common goal before true encouragement can be effective. Once a partnership is established, challenging one another can become a constructive process in the lives of parents and school staff.

Encouragement from Parents

It would be foolish for a teacher or administrator to ignore the insight of parents into the school. Parents have a unique, and very valuable, perspective that needs to be properly embraced by school administrators and classroom teachers. This does not mean parents should have an open door to bash teachers or policies they do not like, but there needs to be a healthy process for feedback from, and conversations between, parents and the school.

When I first started as a teacher there was a particular PTA Meeting that I attended which resulted in all PTA Meetings for the school to end. Honestly, it was a nasty meeting; everyone at the meeting, beside the few angry parents, were uncomfortable, and it was not healthy. But over the years I saw the decision to shut off parent feedback resulted in a frustration for parents.

Remember, parents are the ones given the biblical command to teach their children. When they choose to attend our school, yes the submit to the standards and policies, but they still maintain the authority and responsibility from God to train their child. The parent's involvement is essential to the growth of the student and school. They must be allowed to challenge school personnel in a healthy way.

Healthy encouragement can only begin when school leaders provide opportunities for parent feedback. School leaders should listen and consider the information the parent brings. Even if the recommendation cannot be done in the manner the parent would like, the parent should know they have been heard and follow up communication should be provided by the leader. As a side note, I would encourage parents to be approach with kindness in their feedback; focused on the betterment of the school not their personal frustration.

If there is an issue with an employee, teacher, or school situation, parents should use the guidance Jesus provides in Matthew 18:15-20 to address issues. First, parents should reach out to the employee the issue is with, most often this is the classroom teacher. If they do not reconcile, the parent should take another person with them, potentially a school administrator. It is only after this step that the issue should be brought publicly, for example brought up in a PTA Meeting. Following Matthew 18 provides a framework for issues to be addressed in a way the protects the school community and eliminates gossip.

Encouragement from Personnel

Just as teachers and administrators need to be open to feedback from parents, parents must be prepared to hear feedback from the school. From classroom behaviors to academic progress, as parents we need to be receptive to challenges from the school for our student. As both a parent and school personnel, I have had a unique view into the behaviors of my own children.

For several years one of my boys would come home talking about how awful the kids in his class were, crying about their unkindness toward him. I was absolutely furious; and was ready to chew out parents and staff about their lack of care for my son. A few years later this son entered my middle school math class and I discovered why he was having relationship issues with his classmates -- he was extremely vocal about how "easy" the material was and continually stated "everyone knows this." His own words were actually the thing that was pushing his classmates away. Many of his classmates did not understand the material and were struggling; so his words were hurtful to them.

I share that story to illustrate how as a parent we do not have a full understanding of what happens in the classroom. So if a teacher or administrator needs to bring up a concern, remember that you're on the same team, everyone is working together for the growth and betterment of our students. Part of encouragement from the school should be to challenge some of our behaviors and parenting techniques, providing insight from research and experience to stir up a family to "love and good works."

Encourage One Another... All the More...

Hebrews 10 reminds us that as we get closer to the return of Christ (each day we live is one day closer) we need to encourage, or admonish, each other even more. As our children grow, we have more time parenting, and we gain more experience in education, we do not need each other less, we need each other more. My encouragement (challenge) to us all today is to be open and receptive:

School, you need the insight of your parents;

Teachers, you need the observations and perspective of your students' parents; and

Parents, you need the experience and wisdom of school personnel.

Plain and simple: we need each other! Get past personal preference, humble yourself, and let other believers stir you up to greater things. This is the power of encouragement in the school.