Where Do I Find Connection?

 

Are We in Trouble?

A recent article caught my attention, "Social Connection in America" Report Shows Grim Results. This article published by the Stanford School of Medicine discusses how a current ongoing study reported that Americans are becoming more disengaged relationally and it is leading to increased levels of disconnection. 41 percent of people in the 2025 survey stated that they feel lonely at least some times and nearly 75 percent surveyed said they only get together twice a month with people they care about.

And before you go over-filling your calendar with activities, the article also explains the disconnection is felt more highly with younger adults than senior adults even though the younger adults tend to have busier schedules. This research suggests that it is not just contact that alleviates isolation and loneliness. As this survey is an ongoing 25 year survey, the research is not complete yet but it does suggest that connection occurs best not just through activity and busyness but through activities that support a common purpose. Steven Crane, the co-author of the report, recommends that attending religious services, committing to volunteer work, and reaching out to current friends more often will have a positive impact on both mental and physical health.

This article is definitely not the first to point out the human need for connection with others. God designed us to be connected. Romans 12:5 tells us, "So we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another" (ESV). As one body we need every part, and if all the parts are not present we are not a complete body. The current state of our nation is causing us to be more disconnected from others, while God is telling us that we are designed to be deeply connected to one another. Connection is essential to God's purpose and our well-being as individuals (Social Connection, CDC).

Get Connected

So how do we get connected? It starts with being vulnerable and taking a chance.

Too often in fear of being rejected, we play out narratives that have not occurred and assume things of others they have not said. Things like, "If I attend that church, I will never be good enough to really be a part", "If I go to that mom's group, no one will be my friend", "If I invite someone over to my house they will think my house is too small". In self-defense we dismiss opportunities for relational connection before they have even occurred. But what if we do choose to be vulnerable, and we go to that church, attend that mom's group, or invite someone over. We might be rejected, but we also might find that connection we deeply long for. The important thing is to not give up looking and keep seeking our connection.

The deepest relational connections I have personally made are through study groups with people in similar seasons or life or situations as myself, or from working together with others toward a common mission. Both of these groups of people I found through church. The local church provides a place where like-minded people can worship, gather in small groups, and serve others -- all solutions to the disconnection noticed in Crane's survey. Getting involved (not just attending every once in a while) at a local church will develop deep connections with people that combat the disconnectedness of society.

We are designed for connection. Don't sit back and expect it to come to you. Take the first step to connect with others.